Nobody will ever understand how much i wanted it so bad, to be honest, i wish there is a time machine where i can go back to that day, and make a different decision in mylife, i really never thought that decision made a great impact in my life.
I feel really miserable right now, don't know where should i go, what should i do, to whom i can talk to, believe me, i'm on my lowest point in mylife right now.
I have been such a very ambitious person since i was born maybe, i wanted everything perfectly correct, but always into facing in a situation where i have to choose whether i just think of myself or somebody else, my heart soo blighted narrow now, and just life realizing just now, that in life you can't makes all succesfull side by side, cause you indeed need to sacrifice one thing you wanted to get something you wanted on the other side.
But now, i don't know, there is even no option for me to really get away with this feeling of failure, i just need to focus on my thing one by one now, i need to focus on that thing now for sure, i won't wasting my time anymore, not this year, i wish to you Allah please make my wish come true, i will do my best but i will let you the rest.
By the way,, these words even can't help me anymore, so i guess I'm have gone mad now :((
